Pinay Mom on Motherhood, Etc.

I woke up when the alarm buzzed a second time just before 6:30 this morning, but Father and Son were fast asleep so I went to the living room and did the routine blackberry check. Then I did the unthinkable and lay down on the sofa, unable to resist the urge to close my eyes again, telling myself I only needed five minutes. And I ended up waking up an hour later.

Oops!!

Instead of stressing myself out over it, I accepted the fact that I was late. I got the boys their breakfast, guzzled my coffee and went on my way. When I start late, everybody else starts later, so I offered to take Angelo to school to save Alan some time.

The conversations I have with my boy during those walks to and from the house to school are truly precious. What else would beat hearing this four-year-old proclaiming he loves me? We talk about people turning into flowers as he gleaned from a story his preschool teachers had read to him, and he asks me if the flowers we pass along the way were people. (I have to find out the title of that book and read it myself.). Although it took a few conversations, he eventually accepted that people turning into flowers is just a storyline and actually isn't reality.

He's beginning to show a stubborn streak in him. (A little bit of me and a little bit of his Dad.)  Sometimes it can be quite a struggle trying to keep my cool -- but I try to be both firm and patient with him.  I feel a different sense of security when his tiny hand clings to mine.. and I am continually surprised by his innocent utterances which I wish I could record and play over and over again.

They do play over and over again --- in my heart and in my head.

Parenting can be such a complicated matter.  Others take it too seriously if you ask me.  My personal mantra has always been to "Go with the flow" so to speak.  It's a hit or miss thing, and the best one can really do is to give it your best shot.  And that's what Alan and I are doing.  Of course Alan has the advantage of having been a parent before with the stepson -- yet he has often told me the things he is experiencing with Angelo are first time experiences he never had with his older boy.  While experience has taught him a lot, there is much more that we are learning together.

I don't have a perfect son.  His imperfections, though, serve to remind me he is human.  That he has a personality all his own, and that there is a part of him that is so much like his father and myself, but there is so much more that is uniquely him.  And like his Dad and I, he has his moods and quirks.  While his character at this point is malleable and subject to correction, I constantly remind myself he is a work in progress.  A four year old who thinks like a four year old.

I try to be firm and I try to be understanding.  Striking a balance between being patient and consistently teaching.  Is he spoiled?  I won't mince words and admit he is.  But he has a good heart which knows there are lines that cannot be crossed, not because he fears punishment, but because there are feelings that will be hurt and a Mom and Dad that will be frustrated.  So no, I do not threaten to put him in the dumpster like an aunt had done. I believe that a certain sense of fear is necessary, but not the kind of fear that will not make him see the reason behind the prohibition. 

I'm giving it my best shot although I sometimes wonder if I'm on the right track.  I look at him and I see him growing into his own person.  He makes me smile when he suddenly says "I love you, Mama..".  He may be able to read the letters of his name and he knows it when he sees it, and although he cannot write his name yet, I see no cause to worry.  We're taking it a day at a time..

Last Friday, I received my first official mail packet from Mrs. C, Angelo's incoming homeroom teacher in Pre-K.  It was a special day for me because it meant we were on the school's mailing list now and my son is part of this academic community.

It meant that we were now into the more serious business of preparing him for the real world -- although it will be a step at a time, and tiny steps at that.  I felt proud.  And I must admit, I was very excited.  I immediately started putting the letters in a binder.  My little boy is going to pre-k!

My 4-year-old is currently in private preschool. We started him off in July of last year and he was put in a "prepper" class, and was promoted to "preschool" in less than 2 months after having been toilet-trained. Alan and I have been very satisfied with hwe his development has progressed despite the cost as he now speaks very fluently, he has started to be more socially adept, and he has become more creatively inclined.

He was recently accepted for Pre-k admission in the public school closest to us and we brought him with us today as we acknowledged acceptance of admission.

He showed some reluctance at the sight of how big the school was. He kept saying he wanted to go to his pre-school class --- and yet we could see that part of him wanted to explore the long corridor.

I can only imagine how he is afraid of moving on, and how comfortable and secure he feels in the smaller classroom he's in right now. But at least he has time to adjust to this bigger world of pre-k. I can't believe he's grown up so much.

In the meantime, I'm here to savor guiding him through each day. I know it won't be long before he let's go of Mommy's hand and insists on going at it alone. So here I am clinging to him tightly -- not quite ready to let go myself.

My company had our annual "Take Your Sons & Daughters to Work Day" last Thursday, and I sort of decided on the spur of the moment to take Angelo. It worked out just fine because my mother-in-law was having another eye procedure and wouldn't have been able to get Angel from daycare.

I have always taken every opportunity to show Angelo where Alan and I work. I want him not only to see where we are in our careers --- but I wanted him to see what he can achieve and surpass if he strives to do well in school. I have always believed that it is never too early to instill ambition in the boy.

The cafeteria and all its offerings was quite a trip for Angelo. We went back up to my office with two bananas. (I brought a full box of cereal and I had water, milk and juice in my pantry.). Other than the occasional embarrassmet of Angelo proclaiming he needed to "make peepee," he really behaved and having him around wasn't too much of a distraction. It was hard at times to tell him to wait for Mommy to finish an e-mail or to keep quiet as I spoke with someone on the phone. We even had a nice polaroid taken with the company mascot which he did not want to let go of.

He actually wanted to go back with me the next day and I had to explain to him we don't normally bring kids to work. It was just a special occasion that's why there were so many "little people" in the office when he was there. My colleague who is the second assistant in the office have agreed that we will bring our little ones during this big event when all the bosses travel on a major recognition conference. I am already looking forward to that.

We've decided on a date based on the availability of the venue and the balikbayan boxes with much of the giveaways/stuff for the loot bag are already on their way to Manila.  (Or at least I hope so...)  I have just over a month to get everything together.

VENUE:  We've made a reservation at Big Red Barn at Fun Ranch in Pasig.  My sister, Ofie, has been coordinating this whole thing and I get more excited by the day.  We've taken the main dining area with the wide screen and which is reportedly near a play area, and I've been evaluating what the program will be so we can leave time for the kids to enjoy the rides and maybe spend some time in Active Fun. 

FOOD:  I've looked over their combo meals which I will supplement with some additional food items.  I find their packages reasonable, and I like that you can actually pull together a mock party menu complete with the additional carts (ice cream, cotton candy), entertainment and other add ons, specifying the number of people attending.  You can make it an affordable package or go all out if you want.  Based on the popular vote back home and with my niece's endorsement, we're going for the Fried Chicken combo (with spaghetti and french fries)and adding some pork barbecue, perhaps some burgeritos, and two or three dishes more.

CAKE: Big Red Barn has hooked us up with their official cake supplier, Layers & Layers Party Cakes, which has shown me a wide selection of cakes with the Lightning McQueen / CARS Movie theme, and I must say I am very, very impressed.  I am so tempted to show the pictures that Arlene Francisco, the owner, had sent me via e-mail, but I would much rather take a picture of Angel's actual cake on the day of the party.  I must say the price that she quoted was also something I was happy with -- not cheap, but not expensive.  And from the looks of the finished product she's promising me, it's well worth it! 

She also offered cupcakes and cookie lollies with the same design and I am leaning towards getting the cookie lollies for the kids. 

INVITATION:  While my sister insists they will make me purchase the invitations, the website seems to make it sound like it's an option they give their clients -- so I'm sticking to making my own invitation.  I'm just waiting to take another picture of Angelo with his favorite Lightning McQueen when we go to DisneyWorld this weekend.

NAMETAGS:  I've already designed the nametags with Lightning McQueen as part of the design and Angelo's name and party details on it.  I just need to print the appropriate number for the kids attending.

I'm the overly excited Mom as you can see.. I've put other purchases for the loot bag on hold until I see what I can get from Disneyworld.

One of the things that go with Angel growing up is his getting more cognizant of the "dangers" the lurk in the world outside his comfort zone. Where he used to be totally fearless, now he gets intimidated by bigger or more rumbunctuos kids. In a sense it gets me concerned that he might not have enough confidence to assert himself, while at the same time, I don't want him turning into a bully. Part of me likes his giving way to other kids and yet part of me feels he's letting himself be taken advantage of.

He's been so used to playing by himself but daycare has given him a chance to hone his social skills. I know that he derives a different kind of thrill when he is among his peers. I don't think he is shy because after warming up to other kids, he doesn't have difficulty blending in.

I may be getting a tad bit paranoid here but it's just the Mom in me. I'm trying not to be overly cautious. I don't want to be one of those moms who constantly remind their kids about what to do and what not to do. So I'm trying to hold my tongue -- watching him in the playground from a safe distance.

I guess as parents, we worry about every little thing. I have to constantly remind myself that all I can do is give it my best shot. And that's exactly what I'm trying to do.

The second assistant in the office excitedly shared her discovery with me this morning of a "chocolate egg" with the CARS characters on it. She warned me, though, that it was over a dollar and she wasn't sure I'd like that. I visited two branches of Duane Reade here where I managed to grab 20 pieces of this Double Crisp Chocolate that was franchised by Disney and I am just so thrilled by this find!

I had really planned on waiting for the Easter Goodies to go on sale but I didn't want to take the chance that the stores would run out before I got the chance to get it.

I've gotten so wrapped up with the little tyke's birthday in May that I have completely forgotten about my own birthday which comes a full month ahead of his. That can wait -- I'm not throwing any parties for that one. Mine is really much simpler -- probably just a luncheon or dinner... I'm happy celebrating others more than myself. Besides, I'm not putting together a goodie bag for my party... * wink *

I guess you can say I learned from the lessons of the 2002 birthday party that we held in Manila.  I didn't bring anything --- all the goodies and souvenirs were from 168 and other parts of Divisoria.  I think it went quite well but I have always believed it is always good to improve on the good things that we did.

So this time around, I'm assembling my goodie bag from here -- well, mostly -- and the theme has been decided.  What else but CARS the movie from Pixar. 

I have managed to get some good deals from the corner 99 cents store, and I was able to corner around 16 of this pencil case set selling for upwards of $2.50 online.  For 99 cents!  I picked up the 16 sets and decided I would come back for the girl's sets later as I was still heading out to the drugstore and the grocery, and I could only lug so much on the walk back home.

Of course when I went back this weekend, they were all out save for 6 of the Princess set and one Tinkerbell.  There was a second kind which would be suitable for the bigger kids, but again I had under 10 pieces.  (So I was still technically short since I'm trying to put together 40 sets.)



I decided to create a different set altogether for the last 10, I picked up two-packs of the notepad, a set of markers each and loose pencils, all with Lightning McQueen on them.  I'm getting there.  Now if I can only find the marshmallow pops advertised by a local drugstore which I haven't found in the branches I've checked so far.

I've also been working on name badges and the invitation which I have been putting together using downloadable graphics from the movie website.  It has taken some tweaking but I'm mighty proud of what I've come up with.  It's still a work in progress so I'll save it for later.

As I had written below and expounded on in my other blog on Motherhood, I've started planning for Angel's birthday in May.  I want to be able to get most of the goodies here so that I can ship them home via door-to-door courier in time.

Yesterday I found myself in Walmart as Alan and Angel browsed the CD racks of Best Buy.  Although we are often in the area, I rarely find myself shopping there despite the bargains because Alan finds it too aggravating to jostle with the crowd.  (By way of illustration, there were actually people cursing each other out on the other aisle.)  I just wanted to see what bargains I can pick up, and true enough, the Lightning McQueen fruit snacks from Kellogg's I was looking for were on sale.  I left the store with 8 boxes of 10 small packets each.  (40 for Manila, 24 for daycare.)

Today I snuck out of the house after Angelo dozed off in the afternoon and decided to check out the dollar store in my neighborhood.  As luck would have it, there were giveaways galore with various Disney characters on them! I snatched up a 5-piece set of 2 pencils, sharpener, eraser and mini notebook.  I only got 16 sets because they had run out, but I think I'll just buy Winnie the Pooh and Tinkerbell for the remaining sets.  They had 8-piece markers and fancy pencils with erasers as well as the mini-notebooks sold in pairs that I can actually pull together to make up for 20 or 25 sets for the boys. 

In this week's ad of RiteAid was an ad for Disney Cars Marshmallow Pops (1.5 oz.) which I excitedly went to the store for, but which, apparently they had already run out of..  I'm hoping to find the item in other RiteAid stores in my part of New York, or in other drugstores where they usually sell single item chocolates or candy.

I'm the crazy Mom going around planning this early, I know.  It's really gotten me all energized, plus the thought that our guests
back in Manila will find the goodies in our gift bag unique and a real treat indeed makes it such a challenge.  So I'm hoping I can find this in some other store before it runs out this Easter season.  Wish me luck!