Pinay Mom on Motherhood, Etc.

Tintin wrote:

hi pinay… here i am again, posting a comment hehe… planning a trip is really exciting, especially with your kid in tow. you might want to check out www.babycenter.com for some tips on traveling with kids.

Tintin, I have an e-mail newsletter subscription to Babycenter.com and have taken note of their great ideas in the trips we have taken with Angel, the longest of which was a 7-hour drive to Williamsburg, Virginia to spend time in Busch Garden and Water Country USA.  We’re pretty good with road trips — it’s the 18-hour flight home that I need to prepare for and the transit through the airports.

Right now he has a fullsize Eddie Bauer stroller which is very good and sort of like an all-terrain stroller — great for the malls, the parks, etc.  We cannot obviously take that because the airlines will only allow us a fully collapsible umbrella strollers as carry on.  Checking in the big one and not having it to transport Angel in the airport is going to be a big problem because it will cut into my handcarry allowance since I wouldn’t have any way to carry anything else besides him and maybe a lightweight purse.  (And mind you, the boy is now 32 lbs more or less so he’s quite heavy.)  While Mom is going with us, she cannot carry anything heavy.. at most, a rollaway bag and her purse.

One big concern is keeping Angel entertained during the flight.  We have a portable DVD player but it plugs into a car jack.  I am considering getting an airplane power cord that will allow us to plug it in and entertain him when he’s awake.  He is not yet at that stage where I can bring along an activity book and have him color it, do connect-the-dots, etc., so I have to be creative about providing him visual entertainment.  He doesn’t sit still for a book yet either, so I’m really stuck with making sure I have the DVD able to play beyond its standby battery power of one DVD or movie.

As far as travel supplies, I have followed Baby Center’s recommendation of calculating how much you’re bringing by the number of hours you expect to be travelling.  Diapers, change of clothes and food is counted in direct ratio to the number of hours of the trip.

I don’t think I’ll have a problem because whole milk is provided by the airline, and we will bring his meals of rice and ulam with sabaw and have it heated in the galley.  Snacks?  I’ve got that down pat to his favorite Wagon Wheels and slices of Potato bread.  His favorite toy are his balls, so I will pack up to 4 of them.  He has a tattered boardbook with the story of MAX & TINY and I will probably bring that, too. 

Phew.. quite a slew of things to bring.. magkandadala pa kaya ako niyan?! LOL

From Anna:

Wow, how exciting! If you haven’t been to the Philippines in a while, let me remind you…it will be extremely hot and humid in April. It looks like you have everything taken care of as far as first aid preparation. I suggest packing some OFF lotion for your baby. And, make sure you drink nothing but bottled water and store bought drinks (juices and milk) while over there to avoid stomach problems.

Duly noted, Anna.  As a safeguard against the climate change, we are staying at a hotel so that the climate and temperature is better controlled and we don’t have to worry too much about Angel.  As for food, I’m already asking my sister to scout around in Rustan’s and Unimart for his usual supplies (of which she is aware of because she helped me take care of Angel for two months when Mom went home to Manila middle of this year), and I’m covered more or less.

I think I better test his reaction to OFF while here because most of Angel’s allergic reactions have been very bad when touch-triggered rather than ingested.  All it takes for a bad rash breakout is for him to touch some egg whites even if in minute quantities on an eggshell.  Nothing life threatening, but I hate to see him having rashes and scratching like crazy.  I’m just soooo excited!

From Justice:

hi there! i was surfing the net when i came across your site’s title and clicked on it. glad that i did. i like your site, not to mention this post.—you see, i used to live there too and actually gave birth to my 2nd daughter there (oh, i have 3 kids by the way). We’ve been residing here in Germany since 2000, but relocating to Singapore in 3 1/2 weeks.

The point of my intro is that my first child was born in Manila and I couldn’t agree with your point about the yaya more. He was 7 when we left for the US and what a shock it was when my daughter was born and I (finally) realized that I had no helper?! (except on the weekends when my husband was home)—it was hard, BUT I have to say, I’m glad that I was able to raise my daughter and have a special bond with her.

Then here in Germany, came my 3rd (and last haha)..we got a pinay au pair to help me out, but honestly, after some years of having no “stranger” to help me care for my kids, my view of depending on a yaya changed dramatically. (of course, when i am having my low moments, i whine about having one, but a day later…all’s fine)…it’s actually not a yaya that I need, it’s a maid to help me with house chores!

Btw, you might want to check out the Tatonka brand for the backpack. It’s pretty sturdy and has lots of space. I smiled as I read the part of what you’re preparing to bring for your little one…..I did the same too. Thank god I didn’t have to use those bandages haha—-if it’s his first time to travel to MNL, then, you have to consider that the change of climate might have an effect on his skin (rashes from the heat) and he might get colds/cough (also due to adjustment). Rustan’s and Landmark have a lot of selections of diapers in case you ran out of your baon pack

(excuse the lengthy comment)

That’s a scary thought.  In Manila, we would’ve had the benefit of a yaya.  I probably would be totally at a loss as to how I would manage without a yaya once we got here.  I’d probably be pulling at my hair trying to manage the day, finding all his things (the petroleum jelly, the hydrocortisone for his rash when he has one, his allergy medicine when he breaks a rash, his fever meds, the cap for his instant thermometer..his food!) 

But I had him while I was in New York, and while Mom’s been here helping me take care of him, we manage when we’re all by ourselves and Alan and I have to take care of the boy ourselves.  We have a family friend who moved to Singapore and whose wife insisted they bring a yaya.  So when they visited a sister here on the East Coast, the lucky yaya tagged along.  (Talk about luck!)  While that may be convenient, I wouldn’t trade what I do taking care of Angel for a yaya here in New York.  As I keep telling Mom, iba pa rin pag ako o si Lola..

I’m getting ready for our trip to Manila sometime end April.  In fact I’m going to make a list of the things we need to bring.  Besides the Cheerios, the Wagon Wheels (his favorite snack), and the Chocolate syrup we use to add a little yum to his milk, I think I might be able to get the Gerber Stage 2 fruit from Rustan’s or Unimart.  (Have to have Offie check that.. same with the apple juice, and of course, there’s Magnolia Fresh milk for his everyday supply.)

I have to put together the usual first aid kit — the hydrocortisone, the claritin or benadryl for kids, his Pediacare, his Tylenol Fever meds, and a bunch of band aids (not that I think we would need it.)  I figure two packs of wipes will do (the 400 pc pack), and a full box of diapers.  I’m just afraid the sizing back home might be smaller (I do have a big baby), and the cotton might cause an allergic reaction.  Better be safe than sorry.

I’m not bringing a ton of clothes even if we’re staying there for 3 weeks, because I do intend to go shopping.  I will bring his birthday outfit because we want to do a birthday party.  (I’m just not quite sure how big or modest it will be.. definitely not a McDonald’s party..)

I’m already looking for a good-sized back pack and we will be getting a light weight stroller to bring.  Since I will be pushing his stroller, it would be easier for me to have my own handcarry items in a backpack, and we will use his big baby bag for his on-flight goodies.  (Which reminds me, we need to get an airport power cord adaptor for his portable DVD player — I need to surf for that.)

I’m trying to picture us during the 18 hour flight home — that’s a long stretch to have a precocious boy in his seat, but I’m going to try to think of ways to do just that — besides the DVD option.  (Alan is suggesting we start training him to listen with headphones..)  I can’t wait to have my little tyke romping into my Dad’s place and surprising him.. that will be a priceless moment indeed.

I no longer know the luxury of waking up late because I have a natural breakfast alarm clock who will make sure I’m up by 7:30 at the latest to feed him his cereal.  I’m not complaining — just that weekends used to be the time to do just that: stay in bed just a tad bit longer.

A pic of my boys mined from my phone originally taken Jan. 2, 2006

The two most important men in my life..

Although my son is all of a year and eight months old only, I can say that he has taught me so much about life in his own simple way..

He has taught me that a smile will take the heaviest burden off my shoulder and my smile is all he has to see to assure him all is well.  What is it in the smile of a baby that conveys a thousand words and a hundred feelings all at the same time?  It is so precious to see him light up when he sees me emerge from the stairwell, although even before he and I make contact, I can already hear his shrieks of delight when he hears me walking in the door..

He has shown me that life is indeed magical when you hold your own flesh and blood in your arms.  I often give myself a pat in the back when I behold him and I still can’t believe I gave birth to this child.  You don’t really get a sense of the magic of creation until you have a child of your own — then and only then do you get the literal sense of “my own flesh and blood”.

He can set the table even if only to help put the placemats and utensils on the tabletop.  Why stop this tyke from helping?

A hug is as good as a verbal “I LOVE YOU.”

From Anna on the West Coast:

I happened upon your blog(s) and believe it or not, have read through all your posts (well at least the posts on your pinay mommy blog. Hats off to you…you are doing a wonderful job of raising your son and managing in the business of the U.S. I can only imagine how I will be able to manage when my husband and I are blessed with our second. My first is now 11 years old but was born and pretty much raised in the Philippines until 2 years ago when he joined us here in California. Yes, we made the extreme sacrifice of leaving him in the Philippines to start off and stabilize ourselves about 10 years ago. Unlike many other Filipinos, we have neither mother nor mother in law to help us out with childcare. Anyhow, I know I will frequent your blog regularly to get tips and encouragement in rearing up an infant/toddler in the hectic U.S. but for right now…a blessed New Year to you and your family…be safe.

This PinayMom says: Anna, I should be the one asking for advice and tips from you!  LOL  But seriously, sometimes sharing one’s experiences helps us to be wiser about this fickle-minded business of parenting.  There really is no wrong or right about it — we just try our darnedest don’t we?

I do feel so lucky to have my Mom here, and I make no bones about telling her how her being around has helped mold Angel’s personality.  At a year and 8 months, he is so helpful in putting the placemats on our coffee table when Alan and I eat Japanese style in the living room while watching TV or a DVD, handing the ketchup, the utensils and the soda to his Dad. Then when he sees me get up, he will  bring what he can back to the kitchen to clean up.  O di ba?  Even if his Dad isn’t finished yet.. he thinks it’s time to make ligpit when Mommy gets up, even if it’s to get more soda or a second helping of ulam or extra rice for his Dad. 

We can only hope that we can instill some of our Filipino values in our children.  I don’t think it is an impossible task, though, it’s a matter of being systematic about it.  So I insist on talking to my son in Tagalog, and Alan usually talks to him in English. 

I am just starting to read to him and I haven’t being doing it regularly.  I did discover though that he loves to hear stories told in a story-telling fashion as I try to lull him to sleep now that I’m weaning him from nursing from me.  I simply tell him the story of our day as if I were narrating it and before I know it, he’s off to La-la land.  When I go home this year, I will pick up some story books for him based on our fables and legends.. I think those are some of the things I would want to impart to him as he grows older.

Should I panic that he doesn’t know his shapes yet?  Or that he is still working on recognizing colors?  I’m not sweating it.  He will just continue to surprise us, I know.