Friday, November 17, 2006

A mother gushing

There was a time when he was so tiny compared to how big he is now — although in truth, he was never a small baby.  He didn’t have so much hair before — I was dying to have his pate shaved so that we can encourage his mane to grow thicker.  (Of course everyone else won out and that never happened..)

He can say “No” with such conviction, and I wish he’d learn to say “Yes” for a change.. but I’m not complaining because now he can say “Nod You, Mama” which is how he says “I love you, Mama.”  So I say to him, “I love you, too, anak.”

I can’t believe it’s now his third Christmas and he’s all crazy about Thomas the Tank Engine and Lightning McQueen.  His stitches on the forehead haven’t quite blended into his natural skin color but they have healed well.  We haven’t gotten as far as potty training but he can now ask to be changed which is a step towards that.

Having him in my life is everything I expected and so much more.  It’s difficult to blog when he’s desperately trying to sleep on my arm so I just put the laptop away and cuddle with my boy until he is off to lala-land.  I love resting my head on his arm and nuzzling my face into his armpit, breathing his baby smell in.  I so love putting my face next to his half open mouth as he dozes off, snoring away — and I literally inhale every breath he takes.

I hate the thought that being in Paris for a week next week means being away from him for so long.  But I close my eyes and look forward instead to future trips where he will be walking the streets of Paris with me.  I want him to see the world and see the differences between cultures.. and appreciate that people are created differently but are not necessarily better than their peers.  It’s difficult to teach those values to a child without him seeing things firsthand.  They are concepts you have to experience to know.. otherwise, you can have an idea of them but not really know what it is until you are there, face to face with the world.
Alan and I hope he will do even more than what we have accomplished.  

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Saturday, November 11, 2006

The wonder of Thomas, the wonder of my little boy

At just two and a half years old, Angel can already name of all Thomas and his friends.  He still speaks in broken sentences but is now very communicative.  Of course nothing beats seeing him smile and watch Thomas with rapt attention even if it’s a DVD he has watched over and over again.

 

He now curls up next to me and insists that he sleep in my arms.  It’s not always easy but it is just impossible to resist.  I like that he is very tactile and affectionate.  These are qualities that I have been hoping to inculcate in him — I want him to be able to show freely how he feels. I want him to be brave enough to touch others and not to be afraid of human contact.  I want him to go beyond the customary kiss hello and feel free to touch another person.  So that when he is a parent himself, he can give his love openly, not left to conjecture, but out in the open.

I’m not worried about him.  Already, he runs to his dad when he starts coughing and lovingly carresses his Dad’s back to help him.  That’s priceless to me.  Little gestures like that beget kindness and compassion towards others. 

Like every parent, I have lofty dreams for his future but I am keeping my expectations reasonable.  But I will be happy if at the very least, he turns out to be a good person.  So that’s what I’m working at. 

I’m keeping my fingers crossed that I won’t be like other parents who pressure their kids to excel.  That would be nice, I am sure, to see him performing and excelling.  But I’d like him to have a happy childhood.  I want him to seek to be at the top only if he wants to — not because I or his father want him to.  We only live life once — and I want to help him live his well, like he has helped me to find my own happiness by coming into my life.

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Saturday, November 4, 2006

A weekend with Thomas the Tank Engine here in Essex, Connecticut

We’re spending the evening here in Essex, Connecticut so we can see THOMAS THE TANK ENGINE at the Essex Steam Train and Riverboat.  It’s our first time to attend  A DAY WITH THOMAS THE TANK ENGINE, and much likey the live performances in New York of The Wiggles and The Doodlebops caught us by surprise, I accidentally found out about this when I tried to go to the official website of Thomas the Tank Engine to browse costumes for halloween.

Tickets online were already sold out and we wanted to make it here this weekend instead of the alternative weekend of November 11 and 12 which would definitely be much colder already.  I called the Essex Steam Train and Riverboat directly and found out that they actually hold 10% or 600 tickets for the day of at the gate, so I could take my chance and come in early and get tickets for a ride.

We meant to leave New York early but ended up leaving at close to noon.  By the time we got here to Connecticut, it was already past 1PM and everything was sold out, down to the last train ride at 4PM.  There were “stand by” tickets but there were no guarantees, no refunds, and they couldn’t be used for the following day.  Thankfully, we had a contingency plan and anticipated this would happen so we had arranged to spend the night in Essex.  We’ll just go to the gate around 8AM tomorrow morning so we can get the tickets for the 25-minute ride.

Hopefully, we’ll get there on time to get tickets for our ride.  Wish us luck!

It was so precious seeing Angel light up and heartbreaking to see him cry when he realized we were going back to the car without seeing his beloved Thomas. 

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My own Thomas

Angel trying on his Thomas the Tank Engine costume for Halloween 2006

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